Sometimes I want to ask myself why my posts are so boooooooooorrrrrring! I just go to type out my day and it’s all “blah”. At least to me. I’m much harder on myself than anyone else. No one else writes boring blog posts, just me. Stop it, self!
Today was a big day. It’s been exactly four weeks since my husband left for South Korea, and I am so proud of myself for the way I’ve been handling it. I have NOT binged on ice cream or sat in front of the TV crying my eyes out as I re-watch our favorite movies like Tangled and Frozen (no judging allowed). July 13th will be a month down! Eight more to go!
It’s also been exactly one year since we left Germany! It’s so weird to think of everything that’s happened since. The year has flown by, and I hope it continues to do so. I’ve never wanted Christmas to come so badly in my life, and I’ve been a little kid with a wishlist a mile long before, so that’s saying a lot. 😉 I’m not sure why I’m set on Christmas, I just feel like the last three months will fly by…and the holidays always seem to go by quickly as well.
Yesterday I learned something new…that I never knew in all my years of living in the south. Car windows can EXPLODE. Yes, I know they’re not airtight, but apparently they still can. Yesterday after lunch I took my husband’s car to work because I didn’t want to get gas in mine, and when I came home, the rear windshield was spider webbed all over, with significant cracks along the sides. I was really scared someone had done it on purpose, but was hoping it was an accident (our trash pick up is Friday, so I thought maybe something flew off the truck and hit my car). When the military police showed up to check it out, they said it was blown out from the inside…they had seen this happen four or five times, the heat and pressure build up in the car until a window explodes. Just my luck, I learn something new the hard way. But still, I was just relived it was an accident and not an ax murderer trying to mess with my mind!
We also had a dog wander into our club yesterday. That was pretty amusing. I was put on “dog duty” since everyone knows I love dogs, which pretty much just meant I kept the dog from following the kids around as they tried to play football. A little boy tried to go inside, and I followed to make sure he was able to get inside and shut the door without the dog following, but we failed. That boy was so sweet though and felt so bad…he’s a tiny little thing, and the dog just pushed him aside like he was a pile of hay and sauntered inside. Half of the kids (and staff) were laughing, the other half were shocked, and everyone started trying to get the dog outside…except one person, who asked if it was MY dog and without waiting for my answer, told me to take it outside because it’s not allowed in (obviously…). I was a little miffed about that, but we managed to get the dog outside and all was well. It made for a good story though!
Today was a bit less fun and a bit more stressful. I’m normally pretty okay but it’s days like this that really make me wish my husband was home. I followed my new doctor’s recommendation and started counseling again, and today was my second session (I was able to find an awesome counseling practice that had evening and Saturday appointments…very much appreciated since I work full-time 8am to 5pm (or 9am to 6pm, depending on the week) in the summer!) So, I know therapy is very helpful and useful, but I also know that it can suck sometimes and bring up painful emotions and memories from the past, and my therapist is very good at her job so we talked and brought up some of those painful things. The words “neglect”, “ptsd”, and “disassociation” were used. So now I am feeling emotional and having second thoughts about not letting myself binge on junk food…(a.k.a. wish I had some in the house)…so I am doing the next best thing, binge watching shows I’ve seen before but love on Netflix, while my adorable dogs nap beside me.
So……happy one year being back in the states! I feel I should do something patriotic, like riding a bald eagle…or perhaps something simpler, like going to Wal-Mart at midnight in my pajamas. ‘Murica!